Generally speaking I prefer selecting what I consider a positive card from my deck when I sit down to write this type of entry. However, I’m not feeling this card one bit today. Perhaps if I had shuffled the cards so they could come out willy nilly, upwards or downwards, I might have selected this one reversed. That far more sums up my irritable mood today.
Part of my irritability at the moment has to do with the desire for it to finally warm up so I can get back outdoors. I want to plant my garden and bring new green life into my home. I feel like that would go a long way to helping me feel normal again. The body heals from injury. It knits itself back together with amazing skill. Sometimes it takes the mind a little longer to catch up. One day I’m fine and upbeat, the next I’m feeling the weight of the last many years of my life pressing down. Every now and then I do feel like the good moments of my life are just brief pauses from the never ending chain of bad moments. That’s not exactly a bright and chipper thing to admit out loud. But there is something to be said for being able to admit it.
With that said, it’s also important to find a way to get a handle on emotions that are running amok. Sometimes I picture myself as the Sarah Jessica Parker daffy witch in Hocus Pocus when she bounces around chanting Amok! Amok! Amok!. Perhaps I need a witchy Bette Milder to give me a knock to the stomach. A comfortable balance needs to be found between emotions and intellect. That is far easier said than done. Little bit by little bit though. Doesn’t help with irritable days like this though. Perhaps we can revisit this card and its more positive attributes.