Down Time


I’m always complaining about my health, typically for good reasons. The past few weeks have been more aggressive mentally and physically. I’ve been having a lot of problems simply functioning — as in walking, taking 5 minutes to stand cooking — and I’ve been in near constant pain from an expanded stomach and back that feel like I’m full of fluid and having the life squeezed from me. This is pushing into my lungs and making my breathing shallow. And if that wasn’t good enough, the tips of my fingers and toes have been numb.

I saw my doctor and found a variety of infections. She couldn’t explain the numbness that was spreading through my legs and becoming quite painful. Two days and many blood tests later I called her office again and they sent me to the ER. I was in so much pain. The ER admitted me because my magnesium was .9, my potassium 2.6, and I was anemic again. My liver wasn’t functioning properly and they feared I had an overlooked infection. And I had so little feeling in my hands and legs I was having troubling standing without help. I stayed a few days while they pumped me full of vitamins and antibiotics. Did quite a few scans in places I was not complaining of pain or fullness and gave me a lot of Mylanta. They were really hoping I was just backed up and needing to let some air out. That was not the case. When they had me back to mostly status quo they discharged me to follow up with my blood doc and regular doc. Saw my blood doc right away. His assistant did every test known to man while I was in the hospital. I had blood drawn twice a day till my arms looks like a junkies. The major take away – yes, there is an infection of some kind, yes, my liver is struggling, yes, another test showed there is some type of disease present, most likely, again, my liver. I got that poor guy seriously healed up after my first major weight loss. I’ve had to go on a bit more meds in the last year though. So I am officially afraid right now. Nothing more I can say about than.

Despite being ill I have responsibilities that do not get to take a break. So I’m letting all my visitors and deck adopters know I am home now and working on orders. My husband took the day off to get them to the post office for me and help where he can. I had to let Maggie go simply because her life is so busy her help is hit and miss and I understand that. I just don’t know when she’s been helping out. For each of my decks I have an ordering sheet and how to step by step. I am printing those off for those times my husband is able to help me. I have to be honest though — as much as I absolutely need the money (my current medical copays have gone past ridiculous) I can’t justify doing so if it makes people wait for weeks and weeks or bad communication on my end. So I’ll probably close my store down for a bit. When I can I will prepackage and label them so all my husband would need to do is print a label and stick it on the package. Most likely throws notices on instagram.

I am absolutely behind in emails. I’m not trying to be neglectful, I’m just having a hard time reading the print on my phone. This is my first time back onto my laptop in awhile. There will be a note about this in the store too.

Posted in: Personal Bruhah

Published by Bethalynne

Bethalynne Bajema is a life long artist and writer who works as art director for her family business The Attic Shoppe Trading Co. Among other projects, she's a prolific collectable card deck maker, adding tarot, lenormand and regular playing card decks to her portfolio over the past decade. When not working or taunting squirrels, you can follow her attempts to become a Practical Magic aunt on instagram or visit her online portfolio.